Rejection isn’t just something that happens in the world of careers and opportunities. It sneaks into the personal stuff too. And, honestly? That’s where it hurts the most.
Six months ago, I thought I’d found something that would stick. Something real, something deep. But like many things, it fizzled out, and I was left with the kind of rejection that takes a lot longer to get over.
It’s one of those things you can’t quite put into words, isn’t it? The hollow feeling after a relationship ends—the feeling that you weren’t enough, that something was missing, or worse, that you were the one who didn’t measure up.
For months after that breakup, I told myself I’d bounce back. I wasn’t going to let it define me. And for a while, I didn’t—at least on the outside. I kept busy, buried myself in work, hung out with friends, and maybe even laughed a little louder than usual. But deep down, I was still nursing that bruise, still haunted by the feeling of being rejected by someone who once mattered.
Fast forward to now. Recently, I tried to get back in the saddle. I put myself out there again. The whole dating thing—swiping, matching, chatting, even going out on a couple of dates. It was supposed to be exciting, right? The first step back into the world of possibilities.
But it hasn’t been.
Instead, it’s been more of the same. The same awkward moments, the same letdowns, the same feeling of I’m not what they’re looking for. Maybe I’m reading too much into it, maybe I’m just not ready, but it’s hard to shake the feeling of déjà vu. Each interaction feels like another reminder that I’m not quite there yet, that I haven’t fully healed, and that it’s still a little too soon to be rushing into anything new.
Rejection, it turns out, doesn’t just come from others. Sometimes it’s from within.
But here’s the thing: I have these incredible friends—friends I adore—who’ve managed to find the confidence to enter new relationships recently. And watching them do it, seeing them take that leap of faith again, has been both inspiring and frustrating. Inspiring because it’s a reminder that it is possible to rebuild, to trust again, to open your heart without constantly looking over your shoulder. But frustrating, because it makes me wonder: What’s different about them? What’s the secret that they’ve unlocked that I haven’t?
I admire them. I truly do. But sometimes I wonder when I’ll get to that point—the point where I’m ready to dive back in without all the baggage. Maybe I need more time. Maybe I’m not quite there yet.
It’s a process. And I know it’s one I’m not alone in. So many of us are caught in the cycle of trying to move on, only to feel like we’re right back at square one. But here’s the thing: we’re not. Every date, every conversation, every time we pick ourselves up after feeling rejected—it counts. We’re learning, growing, and eventually, we’ll find our way back to the place where we can love again. Whether it’s with someone else, or better yet, with ourselves.
So if you’re like me—feeling stuck in the “not quite yet” zone—know that it’s okay. We don’t have to be perfect, or even anywhere near ready. All we have to do is keep going. And eventually, that next chapter will find us, when we’re truly ready for it.
Until then, I’ll be right here, still healing, still trying, and still believing that one day, I’ll find my way back to the kind of love that’s been worth waiting for.